But before I go into the rotten things I do want to say...
One of those friends is the step sister of my abusive ex. She, let's call her Maggie, for arguments sake, is the most amazing and wonderful person. Maggie is full of love and just pure joy. When I was with her step-brother (and normally I would not differentiate but in this case I need to) I am not sure she had any idea what was going on. She was so young and carefree. But she was my friend. When I was a size 10 and still thought I was rubbish, she propped me up. We laughed (if you are reading this, remember zooming down the highway back to the Gold Coast singing at the top of our lungs to Faith Hill - I remember like it was yesterday), smoked far too many cigarettes over coffee - at 7am, in Brisbane, while we waited to go to work (hell, we chose to get up at 5am in those days!) and generally just did "happy stuff".
Maggie lost her mum some years ago. Essentially, my ex mother in law. But I didn't know. As we had drifted apart. It was necessary for my healing. We connected again, not sure how (feel free to chime in here Maggie) and it has added such a wonderful dimension to my life again. We are not close, as in besties, but every now and then we reconnect and it feels like yesterday.
We connected again and I was to find out she had also lost her father recently. Essentially leaving her in the world with her husband and her son, which is not alone but can make you feel very vulnerable. I am so sorry my friend, life can be terrible sometimes. I know he was your world. I can't bring him back and I can't fix it. But I can say the sun will shine again one day, I promise.
Another friend is my ballsy American friend, let's call her, Emily. Emily bounded into my life in April 2000 and wow, I never looked back. She kicked me under the table when I called our CEO a self righteous c*** (sorry readers, but he was, he was a right, asshole) and supported me when, surprisingly, I got "retrenched" two weeks later... Again, she has faded in and out of my life for 16 years. We chat occasionally but recently spent a weekend together after the passing of her, well, the love of her life. Only thing is he didn't really know... Well, he did, but it was difficult... I was going to my magical place at the beach and Emily joined me. We drank too much, cried a lot and enjoyed a walk along the beach, where a pod of dolphins magically appeared. About 40 of them. You ask anyone who frequents that beach - it is unheard of. We both think it was the love of her life telling her he was there..
Anyway, where I am going with this is, over the last 18 months I have felt there have been a lot of fair weather friends in my life. But these two remind me that good friends are not people you talk to every day, every week or every month. They are friends who are there, over time and over years. Regardless of circumstance.
Thank you "Maggie" and "Emily". You rock. And you remind me - there are true friends out there who are not fair weather. I look forward to many happy years with you both in it.
Axxxxxxxxxxx
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